The heartaches of parenting

babies and kids cry. they get hurt. it's a fact of life. you always hate to see your baby upset, but realize that they have to go through it - it's part of life and we went through it as well. they go to the doctor, they have to get shots, they cry.

BUT when your child has to go through something "out of the norm", sometimes it hits you harder. for me it did anyway. the ladybug had to have some dental work done yesterday. not a real big deal - she had two cavities in her baby teeth - one they crowned, the other was far too gone that they had to pull it. the dentist also put sealants on her back molars, which is a fairly standard procedure for kids to help prevent cavities. i had the same thing when i was a kid. so anyway...in theory, fairly simple procedure. no biggy.

i've had a lot of dental work in my life including 2 surgeries, so i understand the pain and the nervousness that goes along with this. to this day, i can't stand having anything done to my teeth. i have reoccuring dreams about all my teeth falling out and it freaks me the hell out. anyway.....

my baby was a trooper yesterday. they gave her some watermelon laughing gas and went to town. everything went smoothly UNTIL the tooth pulling. (keep in mind, i am right here with her watching all of this and holding her hand) 1st mistake - me watching. the dentist started to work her way into this tooth and move it around with some force and i heard the ladybug let out a wail and started crying her little heart out. she squeezed my hand so tight i thought she had almost broken it. i can't explain to you how i felt after this was over with. i felt like i could cry for 5 days straight. i hated that she had to go through that and the pain that went along with it. i haven't felt like that since she was 5 days old and circumstances led us to a horrid hospital visit. 8 years of her life going through things that normal kids do, but last night, i wanted so badly to be able to take that experience away from her and put it on me. (i'm still teary eyed).

she was pretty miserable for about an hour after the procedure, then bounced back like nothing had ever happened. when i was putting her to bed last night i told her how sorry i was that she had to go through that and that i wish i could have taken the pain away from her. i was crying a bit and she looked at me and said "it's ok mommy. it's over with now...i feel fine!" then comes the part where you realize that your child is stronger than you are over a situation. wow.

what a bizarre feeling.

so she woke up today feeling great and back to her old self again and all is forgotten. she was pretty excited that the tooth fairy left her $2.00 though. she said she must have left her more since it hurt her and she had to have her tooth pulled. what a toot. :)

so now i'm bucking up because i now realize that as she is getting older, situations like these could possibly happen a little more frequently. maybe it's the fact that she remembers the pain now and remembers the experiences, as when she was a baby, she doesn't remember things as much. i have along road ahead of me. give me the strength.