Friday, December 28, 2007

Laugh of the day

Laura says: blodlelelele
Aude Yo mama says: bnebnekbaibe
Aude Yo mama says: thats german for "blodlelelele"
Laura says: did you hock up a loogie in that one?
Aude Yo mama says: i hocked up yo mama
Aude Yo mama says: then out her out on the streets to make me some $$
Laura says: ewwwwwwwwww
Laura says: hahahah
Aude Yo mama says: shes a hocked hooker
Aude Yo mama says: wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Aude Yo mama says: did you just grab my butt?
Laura says: lol
Laura says: no
Aude Yo mama says: whatever
Aude Yo mama says: i saw you
Laura says: i've been at my desk you freaky deak
Aude Yo mama says: you look like a cup of hot chocolate today and im gonna drink you
Aude Yo mama says: NO
Aude Yo mama says: u WERE at the water holey oh
Laura says: lol

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

It's over....thankfully

i don't know what the hell my deal is this year, but i could not WAIT for christmas to pass. the ladybug got LOTS of goodies, so i know she was happy and that's all that mattered in my eyes this go round. i got an unexpected ipod shuffle from a dear friend so i am going to try and figure out how to use this thing and move into the digital world. (this coming from a girl who has avoided mp3 gadgets and stuck with my cd collection) deep breath.

the madre got me what i asked for - a radar detector...yes, i'm a little lead footed.

today is nasty outside. 40ish degrees and raining. lovely. bella has a cold - i need to take her to the vet - she might also be blind in her left eye. i got mad yesterday trying to do the crescent roll job that my sister does every year, but i got stuck with it since she bailed on us this christmas. burned the f out of my middle finger on the oven putting marshmellows atop the sweet potatoes. ate way too damn much because i decided to not eat anything before the big dinner. tryptophan set in and i was zonked. could not wake up this morning and now i am at work AGAIN bored out of my gourd. i need a nap. damn i'm cranky.

one good thing in the last couple of days is i finally started again and finished the kite runner. it took me almost a month to get past page 16 of the book. i kept starting it and putting it down, then had to start over again because i forgot what the hell had happened. finished it up last night - started christmas eve. i wanted to get it read before i go check out the movie. if you read any book in the near future, i HIGHLY recommend this one. it was utterly unbelievable. so well written.

bah humbug.

Monday, December 24, 2007

Have a holly jolly Christmas

welpppppppp, seems like me and 5 other people are the only people in the u.s. having to work today. bah. hopefully we will get off early, because this is just retarded. i can hear crickets chirping in my office.

so i just wanted to take a quick moment to wish everyone a very very very merry christmas spent with family and friends and good memories. as much as i'm not in the spirit this year, i'm finally feeling a tinge of it. :)

oh also, i need to pimp myself here for a moment. i opened my own little etsy shop for my jewelry. check it out here:

ho ho ho!

Friday, December 21, 2007

Drive-by Flashbackin'


and out in 3.....2......1

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Happy Fookin Holidays

ugh...this is what i'm buried under. for god's sake people, go on vacation already and leave me alone!!!!!!!!

update 1 hour later today....and NOW they are piling up on the floor. someone please shoot me.

The heartaches of parenting

babies and kids cry. they get hurt. it's a fact of life. you always hate to see your baby upset, but realize that they have to go through it - it's part of life and we went through it as well. they go to the doctor, they have to get shots, they cry.

BUT when your child has to go through something "out of the norm", sometimes it hits you harder. for me it did anyway. the ladybug had to have some dental work done yesterday. not a real big deal - she had two cavities in her baby teeth - one they crowned, the other was far too gone that they had to pull it. the dentist also put sealants on her back molars, which is a fairly standard procedure for kids to help prevent cavities. i had the same thing when i was a kid. so theory, fairly simple procedure. no biggy.

i've had a lot of dental work in my life including 2 surgeries, so i understand the pain and the nervousness that goes along with this. to this day, i can't stand having anything done to my teeth. i have reoccuring dreams about all my teeth falling out and it freaks me the hell out. anyway.....

my baby was a trooper yesterday. they gave her some watermelon laughing gas and went to town. everything went smoothly UNTIL the tooth pulling. (keep in mind, i am right here with her watching all of this and holding her hand) 1st mistake - me watching. the dentist started to work her way into this tooth and move it around with some force and i heard the ladybug let out a wail and started crying her little heart out. she squeezed my hand so tight i thought she had almost broken it. i can't explain to you how i felt after this was over with. i felt like i could cry for 5 days straight. i hated that she had to go through that and the pain that went along with it. i haven't felt like that since she was 5 days old and circumstances led us to a horrid hospital visit. 8 years of her life going through things that normal kids do, but last night, i wanted so badly to be able to take that experience away from her and put it on me. (i'm still teary eyed).

she was pretty miserable for about an hour after the procedure, then bounced back like nothing had ever happened. when i was putting her to bed last night i told her how sorry i was that she had to go through that and that i wish i could have taken the pain away from her. i was crying a bit and she looked at me and said "it's ok mommy. it's over with now...i feel fine!" then comes the part where you realize that your child is stronger than you are over a situation. wow.

what a bizarre feeling.

so she woke up today feeling great and back to her old self again and all is forgotten. she was pretty excited that the tooth fairy left her $2.00 though. she said she must have left her more since it hurt her and she had to have her tooth pulled. what a toot. :)

so now i'm bucking up because i now realize that as she is getting older, situations like these could possibly happen a little more frequently. maybe it's the fact that she remembers the pain now and remembers the experiences, as when she was a baby, she doesn't remember things as much. i have along road ahead of me. give me the strength.

Monday, December 17, 2007

~ Happy Beading ~

this may be a spoiler for some folks that i have made christmas presents for....but i couldn't wait to post, because i have my first necklace for sale now on ebay. :)

i met with the sweet ms. dandelion seeds a little over a month ago for some beading fun. she taught me the how to's and ever since, i've been a beading fool. i LOVE it and have found a real knack for it.

listing is HERE.

i named this piece ~ Autumn's Breath ~ ..... i was so tempted to keep it for myself, but i want to start sharing my creations with other people. :)

i also created a myspace page to display all of my creations : you can check it out HERE.

Our new addition

i'm so excited about our new addition to our little family. :)

the ladybug and i have adopted a little kitten. her name is isabella or as we call her "bella". i finally got her to sit still for a few minutes this weekend so i could snap some pictures of her. she's 11 weeks old and the sweetest thing ever. hopefully my allergies will not consume me...ha! happy christmas to the ladybug! :)

Friday, December 14, 2007

Flashback Friday : Volume 13

today i have one of my all-time favorite bands : the cocteau twins. i absolutely am in love with elizabeth fraser's voice...from the moment i heard it for the very first time. saw them in concert once - mid 90's at deep ellum live. what a show it was. not many people are even familiar with the band, much less any of their songs. so, if this is you, i encourage you to buy a songs for itunes....whatever. take a won't be sorry.

i will leave you with two videos for the flashback friday today :

1st : "carolyn's fingers"

2nd : "iceblink luck"

Thursday, December 13, 2007


after a few hours of fighting with my insomnia the other night (which i'm so shocked that i have had since work has been STRESSSSSSSSING me to the max), i caved in and turned the tube on. strange days was on. i forgot what a freakin BAD-ARSE movie this is. not to mention, angela bassett looking mighty tasty. whew. anyway...drifting from my point here.

i started to drift off a bit towards the end and when the credits came up being in a semi-conscious daze that i was in, this song took me to another world. i knew once the male voice rode in on this song that it was none other than peter gabriel. fucking genious he is. i rank him up with sting with all the genres and all the different musical accomplishments they have both made in their lives. ol' petey does, however, have one bad mark on his record being linked to rosanna arquette and all, but hey, i'll forgive him for that - it was a long time ago...and besides, he got a hit song out of it. ;-)

the song is called "while the earth sleeps" by deep forest and peter gabriel. this is how i saw/heard it:

but close your eyes and feel it.


i have a surprise for ya'll, but have to get pictures first, so i will post the surprise soon :)

Friday, December 07, 2007


Jeep purchase : $15,000 on debit mastercard

Maintenance / Accessories : $1,000 on debit mastercard

Breaking apart your 1985 jam box and duct taping the speakers to the sides of your jeep for the ultimate pimped out sound system : PRICELESS

(yes, this is an actual Jeep in the parking garage at my place of employment. i'm not making this up folks)

Flashback Friday : Volume 12

aloha kiddies.

don't have much time to yammer today, but today's flashback friday is a tune from another one of my fav bands - new order. beautifully written song called "regret". enjoy. happy friday!

(ps. for a little giggle, check out this live video of "regret" that i found when searching - apparently at the scene of baywatch. haha!)

Thursday, December 06, 2007


this song made me feel great this morning, so i thought i'd share:

g. love w/ tristan prettyman

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Oh, yah...we are at war because...uh...uh...i forgot.

THIS really just makes me want to hurl.

gee....didn't see that one comin. (notice the sarcasm) what a fucking douchebag.

Monday, December 03, 2007

The Grieving Process

how long should the grieving process last? there are many things you can grieve over. the death of a loved one....a pet....the loss of a significant other leaving your life...the loss of a job....etc.

everyone handles grief and loss differently. for me, it hits me hard & head on, then almost immediately, i start the healing process. why? because we only have this one life to live...we can't spend the rest of our lives grieving over something that we've lost. we have to make the most of what we have and try and move on with our a new chapter. i didn't always feel this way. i would feel sorry for myself and crawl into a small hole for however long of a period of time and just mope. and waste away. not anymore. however, i haven't experienced the death of a child or a parent. i might feel differently or handle that loss completely different.

it's reaching 2 months since the initial "breakup". i grieved a lot for weeks on end. i was miserable. my spirits were eventually lifted when hope was brought back to me. that hope got taken away from me 2 weeks and 3 days ago. i was very very upset, but prepared in a sense. because i had already been through a grieving process the month prior.

people tend to judge other people in how long someone should grieve. ie: husband dies of 30 years to wife. wife is remarried within a year of his passing and already started a new life.

is that too soon?

personally, i tend to try to look at it from this perspective: everyone's situation is different, but WHO AM I TO JUDGE from an outside perspective? how do i know this person's situation? how do i know that her dying husband told her on his death bed to promise to move on with her life immediately and experience all she can to the fullest? hmmmm....that's something to think about.

you may never fully complete a grief process for the death of someone close to you or losing the love of your life (not to death, but to situation).

but i think the point is to not let your life completely stop. you have to allow yourself happiness in this life and you have to allow yourself to move on from your heartache. you are allowed to carry it with you and keep it close to your heart without it overcoming your being. you are allowed to carry that person with you in your heart until the day you die....but still be able to experience joy.

my hardcore grief process has come to an end. i'm ready to move on. i miss him very much, but i'm also not going to let his decision in this put a halt on my life. i have to move on...and search for that person that compliments me. to search for the soulmate that i thought was him? maybe he is that person....but i can not force that upon him when he is not willing to fight for us or when he has so many other deep seated issues that he needs to get through. i need to find my own happiness and my own path.....i have to be open to finding it again. i can't be closed off in that sense.

i recently read someone's view on the perfect mate. they weren't sure if they believed in such because people are constantly changing. and i never thought of it this way, but it was something that made me ponder the meaning. and i got it.

so here i am releasing my grief and moving on to the next chapter of my life. and just in time for the new year ahead.


i remembered reading this and had to go back and find it. i found it very helpful:

October 4, 2007
Stronger For It
Mending A Broken Heart

Heartbreak happens to all of us and can wash over us
like a heavy rain. When experiencing a broken
heart, our ethereal selves are saturated with grief,
and the overflow is channeled into the physical
body. Loss becomes a physical emptiness, and
longing is transmuted into a feeling that often
cannot be put into words. Mending a broken heart
can seem a task so monumental that we dare not
attempt it for fear of damaging ourselves further.
But heartbreak, like all emotions, falls under the
spell of our conscious influence.

Often the pain that wounds us most deeply also
leaves the most enduring mark upon us. The shock
that becomes the tender, throbbing ache of the
heart eventually leads us down the path of
enlightenment, blessing our lives with a new depth
and richness.

Acknowledging heartbreak's impermanence by no
means dulls its sting for it is the sting itself that
stimulates healing. The pain is letting us know that
we need to pay attention to our emotional selves,
to sit with our feelings and be in them fully before
we can begin to heal. It is said that time heals all
wounds. Time may dull the pain of a broken heart,
but it is fully feeling your pain and acknowledging
it that will truly help you heal. Dealing with your
heartache in a healthy way rather than putting it
off for tomorrow is the key to repair. Gentleness
more than anything else is called for. Most
important, open yourself to the possibility of
loving, trusting, and believing again. When,
someday soon, you emerge from the cushion of
your grief, you will see that the universe did not
cease to be as you nursed your broken heart. You
emerge on the other side of the mending, stronger
for all you have experienced.

Before I forget.....

i wanted to thank my sweet dandelion seed for bestowing this sweet little award upon me.

love ya sista.

Friday, November 30, 2007

Flashback Friday : Volume 11 (and 100th post)

this is my 100th post guys - wow. a little over a year and 100 posts. groovy.

today, i am dedicating this Flashback Friday to someone who has had MAJORLY HUGE influence on me personally. i would consider her one of my heroes and my mentors. listening to her music and following her since high school has helped me through some tremultuous times in my well as some good times. over the years, her style in music has changed from dark and obscure and sometimes angry to STILL obscure, yet more peaceful and uplifting.

ms. tori amos.

today, i give you guys the video for "baker, baker" from 1994's album "under the pink". this was a life-changing album for me and saw me through a very rough time in my life. i give you the live version off of the tonight show in 1994....

thank you tori for being such an inspiration and such an amazingly strong woman.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Ron Paul

i don't usually speak much politics on my got me into some trouble once even though this is MY blog to vent as i please....anyway....beside the point....i'm going to say a little something about who i will be voting for in 2008. Dr. Ron Paul.

most people that know me know that i can not stand (being nice here) the current *person* who is in office at the moment and all of his loyal followers that work alongside him.

i never got into politics too much....until roughly about 6 years ago when shit started hitting the preverbial fan. i started doing my research and started to really get concerned as to what the hell was going on in the government world.

i voted for the first time for anything in the presidential election of 2000. i voted for ralph nader - not because i thought he would win...but because i wanted to try and help in the vote to increase the percentage in order for the green party to start receiving federal funding. meh. that didn't happen by several percent.

i voted again in 2004. knowing and thinking that all the other candidates were worth a piece of shit, but just voting for the "other guy" to try and get fuck-face out of office. of course that didn't work.

i'm not familiar with prior presidencies really that occurred in my life time with the exception of clinton and bush sr. and with both of them, i didn't pay much attention, so i have no opinion on either of them to be honest. because i didn't care. which is a VERY bad attitude to take being in this country. and not caring and going along with the sheeple, that's just what we get. for not having a voice of our own.

i'm jumping in this time around. for once, now that i actually doing my research and worry about the future of this country for myself, my daughter and for my unborn grandchildren (who may or may not come about), but IN get the idea.

i am by no means going to be making this a political blog. that's not what this is about for me....BUT when i have something to say...i'm going to say it goddamn it. and i'm not going to be afraid to say what i feel or who i'm going to vote for and why. because i now have my reasons from doing my own work and finding out what i can about these subjects at hand.

all politicians are crooks and liars...we all know that. but for once, i finally think there is someone who is actually worthy of running for the presidency and who i think would benefit our country more than any other candidate could.

and i can honestly say that i am actually surprising myself because i have completely pulled a fast one and will be voting for someone in a party that i NEVER felt i believed in. but he's different. in my eyes, he shouldn't belong to any "party". we have become so divided as a nation in the war of the parties anyway. so i won't look at it that way.

i'm voting for him as the best individual i think that will be up for the task at hand. not because he could be a republican...or a democrat or an independent, etc....but because i believe in what he stands for.

let me also preface this by saying that i don't believe in EVERYTHING that he believes in. some things i feel i am more liberal on....but in general, i think he has the right ideas and the right state of mind to go into a presidency for the american people.

these are the things about ron paul that drew me in and made me think : wow, this guy's onto something:

1. he voted AGAINST the war from day one and is STILL against it now and is ready to bring the troops home.

"It's time American soldiers quit being killed and it's time for us to quit killing a lot of other people who have not attacked us" - Ron Paul

2. he believes in going back to the way of restoring The Constitution. what this country was founded upon. we have swayed too far away.

"The moral and constitutional obligations of our representatives in Washington are to protect our liberty, not coddle the world, precipitating no-win wars, while bringing bankruptcy and economic turmoil to our people." - Ron Paul

3. he has NEVER voted to increase our taxes & wants to abolish the IRS.

4. he has been and will be fighting for OUR FREEDOM.

"I don't want us to worry about the borders between North and South Korea and between Iraq and Syria, I want to worry about our own border." - Ron Paul

5. he doesn't believe we should police the world - less government = more freedom.

6. he believes in a more conservative nationwide government, but a more liberal statewide government.

7. he voted AGAINST the patriot act.

8. he is working hard to protect our civil liberties.


i do not say these things to sway anyone's beliefs or their votes. why i posted this is so you can all see with your own eyes that if i can do the research, so can you. i do ask that everyone i know PLEASE make an informed decision this time around. our country is in serious termoil and needs a complete revamping. and whomever you vote for, believe they can do the job and make an educated choice. don't be one of the sheep.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007


pardon for the lack of posting lately guys. for a number of reasons that you could probably care less about : work has been hectic...haven't felt very thoughts are too muttled inside me noggin. but you know....why am i sorry really? nothing to be sorry about. it just is.


thanksgiving was ok. nothing special, but got to have a nice dinner with a few family members at a cafeteria here. that's why it was "ok". but quite honestly, thanksgiving isn't too huge of a deal for me - hasn't ever really been. i probably shouldn't say that and should be more blessed and thankful for what we have because of our forefathers, but why do we have a DAY to do that? i know i know...we have to stop and truly be thankful. so really i'm just talking out of my ass and making excuses. shame on me. next year, i plan on not having a thanksgiving feast and volunteering at a shelter or something of the sort to help feed the homeless. that to me will make it more meaningful.

a lot of the holiday was spent playing ungodly amounts of games of uno. (specifically "harry potter" uno) with The Ladybug (the bebe). the weather was too wretched to do anything other than stay inside in your safe and cozy bungalo. it did snow on thanksgiving for about 2 minutes. which around here is WHOA - a huge amount. ha

i also got to see August Rush. this was such an amazingly beautiful film. if you haven't seen it yet, you must go check out this movie. it's definitely one you want to own, but to get the full effect of the music in this movie, you MUST go see it in the theater first. i won't talk to much about it since i'm sure a lot of people out there haven't seen it and i don't want to spoil too much....just know that you won't be sorry you went and saw this. it literally makes you look at life a little differently every day.

Because it makes work fun

Laura says:
have you ever noticed that the closing dept has a stinch of puberty / testostrone to it?
Laura says:
Laura says:
like a teenage boys bedroom
St. German says:
St. German says:
St. German says:
you have a wierd nose
St. German says:
what is my "smell"?
St. German says:
St. German says:
Laura says:
Laura says:
St. German says:
they are all like 20 over there
St. German says:
running the place
Laura says:
i have a super sensitive nose
St. German says:
and im the old lady
St. German says:
working as a f'ing assistant
Laura says:
that's why it smells like a teenage boys bedroom
Laura says:
Laura says:
you know what i mean when you smell something and it smells like "recess" from when you were a kid?
St. German says:
Laura says:
see i'm not that weird
St. German says:
katlin sometimes smells like cafeteria/sweat
Laura says:
Laura says:
or like when you walk into subway and pick up your order and you walk out with that "subway" smell
Laura says:
fresh baked bread
Laura says:
St. German says:
um well you smell stuff nobody else would
St. German says:
St. German says:
so if i walk into a room full of midgets, will i smell like one?
Laura says:
yes, i know. i am a little weird then. just a little.
St. German says:
casue that would be AWESOME
Laura says:
LOL midgets don't smell
St. German says:
St. German says:
well thats why i like you
St. German says:
they dont?
St. German says:
i smell but midgets dont?
Laura says:
dummy - they don't have a "certain smell"
Laura says:
like the closing dept - if you walked back there for 30 minutes and walked back out you would probably smell like a teenage boys room too
St. German says:
thats hot
Laura says:
that would make me throw up in my mouth
Laura says:
St. German says:
i want to smell like a hot teen boy
Laura says:
lol you are a freak show
Laura says:
i am so putting this convo in my blog. you are gonna be a celebrity again.
St. German says:
St. German says:
I will have to start doing autographs
if you keep it up
St. German says:
and i can charge $5 each
St. German says:
then pay my horrific speeding ticket
St. German says:
and go into midget porn
St. German says:
then i will smell like a sexy midget
Laura says:
Laura says:

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

One Love

Everytime I hear this song, I feel a warmth and I thought I would share this morning. How can you not just feel completely uplifted everytime you hear this matter where you are....or when. Because in the greater scheme of things, we truly are "one"...all of us....united as one.

(p.s....there will be no Flashback Friday this week you guys - I have a 4 day weekend, so I won't be posting after today - sorry - but I want to wish everyone a joyous thanksgiving spent with family and friends - may love surround you)

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Monday, November 19, 2007

Picking up the pieces

my weekend was a complete roller coaster. i wrote about it on my myspace blog and i may cut and paste it later to here, but i definitely don't feel like reiterating what happened over the weekend.

there is one thing that i am TRULY excited about that i did yesterday that's now going to become a really healthy and good thing for me, but i can't broadcast it yet. i will after the holidays are over.

other than that, not too much to say today. last year i became OBSESSED with sarah mclachlan's album - "wintersong" around the holidays.'s happening again. i absolutely adore her. have for so long and still do to this day. so i will leave you with the song that has been on continuous play for me in one form or another for several days.


Friday, November 16, 2007

Happy Birthday, DK

i had to make a birthday post for one of my most favorite jazz vocalists alive today. i adore her. she's ever so sultry and seductive and beautiful and sexy. (and still to this day, i'm baffled by the attraction to elvis costello, but hey....they make a cute couple in a twisted sort of way)

happy birthday, diana krall!

Flashback Friday : Volume 10

for those of you that know me, know i am a Depeche Mode FREAK to say the least. i'm surprised i haven't done a post for them yet on my flashback fridays, so today i give you 2. (since i skipped last week also - sorry - i'm slackin guys)

even if you aren't a HUGE fan of DM, if you've ever seen them live, you have to admit they put on an amazing show. (i should know, i've seen them live 7 times :) )

"Never Let Me Down Again"

"Black Celebration" live in Prague 2001

Monday, November 12, 2007

Nu Monia

for those of you that didn't know, i have pneumonia. YUK.

i was diagnosed wednesday evening and i've been almost bed-ridden since. so i'm still here, but i haven't felt like posting. it will probably be another few days before i'm up and about and feeling back to normal again, so bear with me.

happy week, all!

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Each Coming Night

I'd like to take you this morning on a somber journey and let us remember our ancestors who lived through this horrible, trying time in america - the great depression.

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

8 Things : I got tagged

hip momma tagged me.

8 things I’m passionate about:

1. my daughter
2. my friends & family
3. music
4. soccer
5. reading
6. bettering myself
7. living more naturally
8. my self worth

8 things I want to do before I die:

1. see my baby girl grow into the beautiful woman she will become
2. travel, travel, travel as much as i can
3. get out of debt (which hopefully will allow me to do #2)
4. get married
5. own a house again
6. get back in shape
7. spend as much time with my loved ones as i can
8. feel accomplished

8 things I say often:

1. i love you
2. woop - boosh (don't ask)
3. shibby
4. word to your mama
5. um....i can't think of anymore (i'm say goofy things around my daughter and sister a lot - it's all her fault you know....i really am intelligent sometimes :-p )

8 Books I’ve read recently (or am still reading):

1. The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
2. Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs: A Low-Culture Manifesto by Chuck Klosterman
3. Map of Bones by James Rollins
4. The Hiram Key by Knight/Lomas
5. HP : 6 by JK Rowling
6. Angels and Demons by Dan Brown
7. Secrets of the Code by Dan Burstein
8. constantly reading the HUD Handbook 4155.1 for work

8 Songs I Could Listen to Over and Over (And do!)

1. Little Wing by Jimi Hendrix
2. Each Coming Night by Iron & Wine
3. anything by Dave Matthews (been doing a lot of that lately)
4. Zebra by John Butler Trio
5. Corcovado by Stan Getz
6. Baker Baker by Tori Amos
7. Keep It Loose, Keep It Tight by Amos Lee
8. Out of Touch by Hall and Oates

8 Things that Attract Me to My Best Friends:

1. we are there for each other through thick and thin
2. we accept each other for everything that we are without judgment
3. they are so much fun!
4. we can do "nothing" and still have the best time
5. they are my world
6. the little things
7. the i love yous
8. the happiness & differences that each of them bring to my life

i'm not tagging anyone because last time i tried, no one played along, so if you feel like playing, please do :)

Pepe Le Pewwwwww

so um, yah. we are sitting here at work on the 9th floor workin away when all of a sudden this HORRID smell comes through the air vents. smelled of a mixture of skunk and fire.
our VP immediately tells us all the go downstairs until they find out what it is...he was afraid it was a natural gas leak.
so we all pour into the elevators and the stairwells and get the hell out of dodge.
spend a few minutes down on the 1st floor - amazingly enough we were the only floor evacutatd AND you couldn't even smell it down there. they tell us it's just a skunk and we can go back up. WTF? how does a skunk get to the 9th floor and only the 9th floor of a building.
so roughly about 30 minutes later, we get this email from the receptionist:
"Building management stopped by. They explained that pest control was trying to track down a skunk and OBVIOUSLY upset it, causing it to spray this awful smell directly into the fresh air intake…so there you have it. Have a wonderful and fresh afternoon."
fooking awesome.
"fresh air intake"? you know what?
i don't even want to know.
i'm gonna smell AWESOME after i leave work today. good thing i don't have a hot date or something. haha - kidding.
peace out my blog friends.

Friday, November 02, 2007

Today's Friday giggle

well, actually it's from yesterday, but i didn't see it until today, so deal....

Flashback Friday : Volume 8 & 9

Hello my lovelies. As promised today I have a two-fer.

Firstly, we have a little known British band by the name of The Stone Roses. I really like this band and this song by far is my fav song of theirs. It's an oldie but goody, and it's so FUNKY!

The Stone Roses : "Fools Gold"

Secondly, we have a band by the name of The Breeders. Formed by Kim Deal of The Pixies and Tanya Donelly of Throwing Muses. They came out with the album "Last Splash" in 1993, which featured the song that I am posting today, "Cannonball". I believe the band is still around, but if I remember correctly, Tanya Donelly is no longer with the band, but Kim recruited her twin sister, Kelley to the band. I could be wrong....I'm going off memory here.

Happy Friday all!!!!

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Happy Halloweeny - Jason & Michael square off

Michael Myers says:
when you wanna go to lunch?

Jason Voorhees says:
in a million years

Jason Voorhees says:
after i chop up this body...hang on

Michael Myers says:
well jason, you wont live that long

Jason Voorhees says:
apparently i have through 36 sequels
Jason Voorhees says:
so suck it

Michael Myers says:
suck m left biotch
Michael Myers says:
my left nut
Michael Myers says:
Jason Voorhees says:
in fact didn't i win in our stand off?

Michael Myers says:
my bloody left nut

Jason Voorhees says:
oh wait...did we have a stand off or was that just freddy vs. jason?

Michael Myers says:
no you died biotch!!!!
Michael Myers says:
freddy and jason

Jason Voorhees says:
whatever. yo mama

Michael Myers says:
no we didnt
Michael Myers says:
but if we did
Michael Myers says:
your ass would be toast
Michael Myers says:
yo mama ate my left bloody nut
Michael Myers says:

Michael Myers just sent you a nudge.

Michael Myers says:
wake up biotch head

You have just sent a nudge.

Michael Myers says:
where yo wanna go eat?
Michael Myers says:
daja has 5 bucks
Michael Myers says:
so like mickey d's or taco hell or taco bueno or chicfila
Michael Myers says:
whatchoo want

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Yah, I got nuthin....

ok so i'm now officially invite only for a while. had to get rid of my "stalker". ugh.


don't have much to report really. first of all, i totally suck as i skipped my Flashback Friday post this past week. SORRY GUYS - i'll make it up with a double this friday ;-)

weekend was good - my soccer team won first place in our division this sunday - so that was very exciting! go chubby burritos! (yes, that's our real name - you can laugh, cause we do)

the ladybug is terribly sick, so i took off work yesterday to stay home with her. she has a stomach bug and on top of that a cold as well. so she is miserable. and the bad news is that i'm over here feeling some symptoms coming on....zicam to the rescue - i hope it helps, but i'm not too optimistic, unless it was just a regular cold coming on. bugger.

so halloween is tomorrow and i couldn't be less excited. that sucks because usually halloween is my favorite holiday of the year. i'm just not at all into it this year. hopefully next year will be a different story. the only thing i actually have been doing is watching quite a few horror movies recently.

so there is the update on my boring life at the moment.

oh oh oh....i forgot. saturday was interesting. jos and i went to a "meet n' greet" for maroon 5. she won the tickets. it was a huge cluster fuck to say the least.....and dealing with those little teeny boppers - oh my gosh (i'm so scared that i know i will have my very own on my hands in a few years - joy). we got to check out the sound check and then meet the band briefly. we then decided to walk across the street and have a few drinks before the show at this hole in the wall bar, which we met our new favorite bartender. needless to say, we drank a few too many stella artois and didn't make it to the show. haha. ah well. it's not really my thing now-a-days anyway...i just went cuz jos asked me to and we ended up having our own little good time.

have a happy week all!

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Can I Stay?

Ray LaMontagne - Can I Stay

Love & Happiness

I've just recently discovered this guy - Marc Broussard. Holy freakin moly does this guy groove. His voice is as soulful as Otis Redding. Not too bad for a white boy.


p.s....i jumped the gun on the invitation only thing and several people reprimanded me for that, so i am public again for another few hurry up if you want me to add you.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007


hey all....

due to the recent changes/events in my life, i've decided to be a little more private for a while. i don't know for how long, but it's just the mood i'm in for now. i've become closed off to certain people in my life as well and focused solely on my closest friends for their love and support. nothing personal, but i need to be selfish and focus on myself right now....i've spread myself too thin for so many years handling other people's problems and being overly kind-hearted, that i just don't have the strength to do so at the moment. not saying that part of me has completely gone away - it never will.....or that i won't return back to the way i was...but for now, this is what i need. please understand that.

with that said, i'm going to make my blog by invitation only for a while. i won't make it that way for about another week, so you will have time to email me with your email address so i can invite you to view it as opposed to the general public being able to see everything i write about.

email me at and i'll add you on the readers list.

lots of love to you all ~ namaste ~

Friday, October 19, 2007

Flashback Friday : Volume 7

don't have much time - i'm leaving work early today (WOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO!), but i had to stop by and post the flashback for today.

taking you back 14 years to 1993, arguably the greatest band on earth - U2. (let me preface that statement with alive and still together....)

i'm not a die-hard U2 fan, but i definitely own a few albums and still think they are freakin awesome.

zooropa was the album, although it did not get much recognition, it wasn't as mainstream as some of the others. my favorite U2 song of all time was on this album though. track #5 : Stay (Faraway, So Close!) (ps. there was also a collaboration on this album - "the wanderer" with U2 & Johnny Cash - great stuff)


Thursday, October 18, 2007

i love my job

me: " we lend on 142 acres?"
VP of operations: laughs....
me: "that's what i thought. it's an estate of some dead guy - house built in 1925...looks haunted...check it out. take a look - in rural michigan and appraiser states 'property contains several older outbuildings in varying conditions' "
VP of operations: "yah...that's where they cut up people and their bodies are never found. um....NO"

Time for some soul cleansing

a soothing visual journey....

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

The way my day week month is going....

Butterfly says: vrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt
Butterfly says: do you have a gun?
Natorchen says: yes
Butterfly says: shoot me right between the eyeballs please
Natorchen says: how 'bout a kiss instead
Butterfly says: and don't miss or i will KICK your ass for making me a vegetable
Natorchen says: that rough of a day?
Butterfly says: i'm just incredibly sick of dumb people
Natorchen says: you and me both
Butterfly says: let's kill them all and just cohabitate with cool people that aren't dumb
Butterfly says: k?
Butterfly says: k

Natorchen says: word
Natorchen says: we would eventually be overrun though

Butterfly says: yah you are would be like lord of the flies and we would be eaten
Natorchen says: stupid people breed... a lot!
Butterfly says: oh well...nice thought while it lasted
Natorchen says: hehehe

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

You've got to come original

i've noticed over the years that my music tastes have mellowed out. i think i finally found my niche in the jam bandish / folky type genre. i sway from it some, but if i was to say what was my absolute favorite type of music, that would be it.

in my "new wave" days, i would listen to harder music. i never got into metal or hard rock...but along the lines of ministry, skinny puppy, etc.

i can't handle that much like i said, i've mellowed.

but i do have those days (like this morning) that i wake up and i just want to crank the shit out of some kick ass music on my way to work and say fuck the rest of the world. (after i dropped the ladybug off for school of course - i'm not that torturous ;-) )

the band i usually throw in for those moments is 311. (or beastie boys depending on my mood)

today was my 311 morning and i now feel refreshed. apparently i needed that and felt some built up aggression over the past few days expell from my body in doing so.

so i have decided to spread some of my good fortune this morning and leave you with two 311 vids. enjoy :)

"come original"

and a little on the mellower side, but my absolute favorite tune by 311 : "amber"

Monday, October 15, 2007


soccer has been kicking my ass lately. i didn't know it was possible, but apparently i have become even MORE aggressive than i was before. which wasn't my intention as i have to remember that i don't have a teenage body anymore. i have quite a few marks of war from my soccer game this weekend, but here's the big one. this is what happens when someone slams down on your toe with their cleat....


Harry Potter's buying a house!

it truly is the little things in life.....

I don't wanna grow up...I'm a Toys R Us kid....

sweet mama, dandelion seeds, tagged me with this:

“5 things you want to be when you grow up. Big dreams that seem like folly, but in your heart of hearts are very real and dear to you. Things that maybe you have forgotten about in the ebb and flow and toil of the everyday, but that never really leave your soul. What you would do if anything at all was possible. Spend some time day dreaming…and then post them on your blog, passing the idea along to 5 others..because sometimes we need to pause and remember our dreams, hey? Maybe just saying it out loud will help you discover even little ways you can make them happen. You can write about that, too.”

  1. my dream in high school was to become a marine mammologist. i dreamt of working with sea life (mammals) out in the wild. something about them has always appealed to me...and still does. but alas, i did not have the patience to go to school for i took the easy road out.
  2. a small store owner in a beautiful, small, natural town...possibly somewhere in colorado or new mexico. i would sell things like eccentric gifts, incense, lotions, handmade soaps, handmade jewelry, etc. i think i would adore this.
  3. world traveler. in some sort of field where i had the chance to travel the world and interact with people of different nationalities and different cultures. and not from an outside perspective either....i want to be right in the middle with them.
  4. work for a non-profit organization ie...greenpeace or peta and experience the global issues surrounding these and be able to be directly involved in making a change.
  5. professional festival goer. i would LOVE to spend my days attending outdoor music festivals around the country or around the world for that matter.

i now tag:


Friday, October 12, 2007

If you love someone....set them free

i want to clarify to everyone that what is going on with me is not "bad"...just trying. i'm having to let go of someone that i love very much for a while for outside circumstances, but in the end, it will all work out. i know this. i trust this. it's just trying for now. it's a good time to write for myself, which i am doing and it's very theraputic. i used to keep a written journal, but i've figured out that over the years, handwriting things has become very hard on my hands. i'm so used to typing constantly and quickly that to handwrite for long periods of time makes me feel like i have arthritis.

technology blows sometimes, doesn't it?

so i'm actively looking for a p/t or seasonal job. i applied 3 places last night in hopes that atleast one of them calls me. i have to do something for a few months. i've also offered up a roommate situation with a close friend of mine, but we will see what happens with that. money is the devil. i've always said that and i will say it until the day i die.

i talked to a close friend of mine yesterday who offered me comfort and much hope, so i could actually breathe again....breathing has been a little difficult lately.

i have many ideas running around inside of me noggin. i have about $150 worth of painting supplies from the christmas before last that are sitting in a closet in my house untouched. do i want to take them out and start experimenting? i want to take some yoga classes also again...but when can i fit them in? (not to mention they cost money)...i want to learn beading (which i intend to do with ms. dandelion seed very soon)....i haven't been practicing guitar like i should be....want to get back into that. gah.

it's overwhelming all of the projects and all the "want to do"s.

one at a at a time.

Flashback Friday : Volume 6

today we're going back to 1987 with Crowded House - "Something So Strong"

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Stay or Leave

Correction for Hiatus

(what i should have said is that i won't be posting anything TOO in depth....) i have also created another private blog that i am writing in for my eyes only just to get me through this trying time, but i'm trying to stay positive....i must.

thank you guys for your kind guys rock.

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

"You Make Me Smile" Award

ok so i had to post because i absolutely needed this today and i love her dearly for including me in her award....

thank you my little dandelion seed :) you make me smile just as much!!!!!!!!!


i think i'm ready for a new layout....any suggestions would be awesome....i want a more bright, free spirited, flowing hippie-style layout. :)

Tuesday, October 09, 2007


hello my faithful reader(s). sorry about the absence of postings of yesterday, my life has taken an unexpected turn and i'm not much feeling like being public about it, so i probably won't be posting for a while. i'm still here and will still be catching up on reading my favorite blogs.

stay tuned.


Friday, October 05, 2007

Flashback Friday : Volume 5

sorry about the "drive by" posting guys....busy bee today....

Today, I've chosen "Living In Oblivion" by Anything Box....


Monday, October 01, 2007

The Feast of The Weatherman

weekend was good...not long enough, but when is it ever? got to spend some quality time with Horizon, which was MUCH needed.

i went and saw "The Feast of Love" with my mom and my sis on saturday. what a spectacular film...beautifully written story and powerful message. the only thing i thought this movie could have done without was the sex scenes. now don't get me wrong, i am no prude and enjoy sex scenes as much as the next guy (girl)....but this was not the movie for that. i think it took away from the plot and just didn't belong. but overall, i was quite impressed with this one. (still not COMPLETELY sure how the title ties into the film...)

afterwards, we got back to my folks house and watched "The Weatherman". i would call myself a fan of nick cage, but i'm a HUGE fan of michael caine. i'm still a little unsure of how i felt about this movie. i laughed my ass off (at inopportune times i'm sure) and felt depressed, then on the other hand, questioning "wtf is going on here?" it was definitely interesting. i must say. not sure if i liked it or not, but i enjoyed watching it that's for sure. i tried to find a clip on youtube where he's describing how he started getting hit by random food in the beginning he thought it was an accident, then as it kept happening he realized it wasn't an accident and somehow had themes of fast food items. i almost peed my pants laughing so hard at this part in the movie.

that's all i got. it's a new month and things have slowed down just a tad for the moment, so maybe i'll be able to catch up on reading some blogs and posting a little more.

Friday, September 28, 2007

Flashback Friday : Volume 4

i have a two-fer for you lovelies today.

i've always loved The Psychedelic Furs. richard butler is definitely one funny lookin dude, but man, has he got some pipes.

of course you all know them from the theme song of the 80's hit film "Pretty In Pink" starring molly ringwald and mr. jon cryer who has made a nice little name for himself on two-and 1/2 men. i'll forever know him as "duckie" though. and of course, how could you forget, the boyishly cute andrew mccarthy, who once tried to play a roll as a bad guy and failed miserably because he's just too sweet. anyshmmooooooooooo....i'm drifting away from my point here, so moving along....

i had a tussle in me noggin about which song i wanted to post. it was a toss-up between "Heaven" and "The Ghost In You". i chose the latter. i'm now going to take you back to 1984 with this sweet lyrical gem :

i will also provide you with the lyrics because it is SUCH a beautifully written song:

A man in my shoes runs a light and
All the papers lied tonight
But falling over you
Is the news of the day

Angels fall like rain
And love (love, love)
Is all of heaven away

Inside you
The time moves
And she don't fade
The ghost in you
She don't fade

A race is on, I'm on your side and
Here in you my engines die I'm
In a mood for you
Or running away

Stars come down in you
And love (love, love)
You can't give it away

Inside you
The time moves
And she don't fade
The ghost in you
She don't fade

Don't you go
It makes no sense when
All your talk and supermen just
Take away the time
And get in the way

Ain't it just like rain?
And love (love, love)
Is only heaven away

Inside you
The time moves
And she don't fade
The ghost in you
She don't fade

nextly, let's stick with the same band and head to 1991 for "until she comes" :

(embedding is disabled, so follow THIS LINK)

in the early 90's richard butler and his brother, tim went on to form Love Spit Love (which strangely enough, richard seemed to gain a little weight and fill himself in and became a little more handsome), whom in my opinion, released their self-title album in 1994 and i absolutely adored it. i didn't follow much after that, but i will always have a place in my heart for The Psychedelic Furs.

happy friday to you all.


Thursday, September 27, 2007

Letting go of past anger

this has been an issue constantly on my mind and in my heart. what sparked me to write about it though, was bluegreendragonfly's post.

14 years ago, i was in a situation where i was raped and around the same period of time, dated someone who mentally and physically abused me off an on for 4 years. he was 8 years older than me - i was young and naive. it doesn't bother me or hurt to talk about it anymore.

i thought i had let this go and moved on in my life, but alas, when you think you do, you find that you carry it with you more than you think - especially in relationships, you find yourself acting on those old tendancies....not on purpose...only because it's all you have ever known.

all of my relationships from that point, had suffered the effect of these happenings in some form or another.

then i met someone (i don't want to divulge real names, but he does read this blog and knows who he is). he was my turning point. he was the only one that said " have these deep lying issues and i love you enough that i want you to get the help you need and i will go through it with you." we went to therapy together a few times....i don't think i could have done it without him. after a while, it became easier and i was able to go on my own. we ended up splitting up for ultimately the reasoning that i couldn't try and make our relationship work and focus on fixing my inner demons at the same time. it was a hard breakup for me because i did love him very much, but over time, i got over it. although, i still in my heart am so thankful for what he did for me...he knows that i am and even though we don't talk on a daily basis, we still are important aspects of each other's lives. i continued with therapy for 9 months after that point. it was the nicest and most caring thing that anyone has ever done for me and the best thing i could have done for myself. it's not for everyone, but in my instance, it was 100% the best thing for me. i was introduced to congnotive therapy and truly dealing with past demons head on and recognizing that when you experience these things they are placed in your memory bank and rear their ugly heads time and time again when something triggers them.

around this same time as well, i bought a bunch of self-help anger management books. after going through the therapy though, my anger was only associated with this and with things in my childhood i didn't realize until i learned to accept them and move on.

i've been a much happier person since that time. have had a couple of defunked relationships - each one different from the next, but learned from.

then i met Horizon. i know i go on and on about our relationship, but he truly is perfect for me.


i still have some underlying issues that i feel seeping out at times. not to the point of beyond reason as i did before, but things that still get triggered on occasion. he is the most honest and most loving man i have been with. and this is a new experience for the both of us and it's a learning experience. most of my relationships have involved some sort of dishonesty at some point...and the last one prior to this was a HUGE disappointment on a lot of levels....not regretable, but learned from. yet you still carry that wall and expectation that your current relationship will have some of these faults....and when they don''s almost a shock. maybe i've just been unlucky in love until now...who knows.

when you meet that perfect person for you, there is still growing pains. Horizon and i have been together now for 6 months and we have had some MAJOR growing pains. and we still do. and will continue to do so, but as long as we both carry that awareness and acceptance of this and keep our communication at the level it is, i have no doubt that we will make it through and we will flourish. a lot of the issues stem from his fairly recent ex (a year ago) - whom he is just now starting a divorce - due to money issues. so being in this position with him and the ex and the kids has put a huge strain on me and i find myself getting upset...recently a little too much.

i am aware of it and am working on it consciously. any advise anyone would like to offer would be greatly appreciated. i have it in me to overcome these annoyances and have confidence in myself. i have jealous feelings and feelings of detachment and helplessness at i stated before...nothing out of control, but regardless i am feeling them. i am talking to him about it all too though, so i know that's helping, but i want to get to the point that i don't let these things bother me.

where do i need to go inside myself to do this - to find this strength?

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Our Ambigram

the beautiful, talented hippie mama, Tiffany, created this gorgeous ambigram for us. i can't believe how beautiful it turned out.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Mr. Wit & Mr. Shaman

i know i have quite a few blogs in my blogroll to the right...some i visit regularly or on a daily basis and some, not as much.

there are 2 blogs that even if i'm busy i make it a point to check them out in the morning and late afternoon. these are two of the greatest guys in the blogworld that i know of. they both brighten my every workday. i am happy to call them my best blogger buddies. :)

Objectivity and Observation



Monday, September 24, 2007

Turning into a Sweettart

over the last 2 weeks, i have developed a SERIOUS sweettart addiction.

i need an intervention.

fo rizzle.

6 Months

today marks the anniversary of our first date - 6 months ago.

i wrote this a few days ago and sent it to my horizon....

i wanted to tell you a story about this amazing person that i know in my life this morning.

i was bored one day - the exact day i can't recall - looking through friends of friends of friends - clicking multiple amounts of times through my myspace account - nothing else to do...just passing the time. i came across this page that caught my eye and made me catch my breath. his profile name said "horizon" and he was beautiful. i read about him and looked through his pictures - the one picture he had of himself and several of his gorgeous children. i was instantly attracted to this person...even though it was only through a computer screen, something about this person drew me in. his interests, his music taste, his overall aura. i was nervous about contacting him, but i took a deep breath and did it. i was unsure if he would acknowledge my email. if he would take the time to write me back or to even see me. or would he just see the email and shrug and move along. to my surprise, he emailed me back. a lovely email as i recall. i was so ecstatic. we wrote long, in depth emails back and forth to each other...with each new email, i was drawn closer to him. i felt butterflies in my stomach every time i got an email from him. we decided to meet. i suggested driving out to fort worth to meet him, he insisted on coming to dallas to meet me. i gave in to the suggestion.

the exact day was saturday, march 24, 2007. we had exchanged numbers and he called me that morning to go over details of our first meeting. the instant i heard his voice, i melted. he had such a strong, sexy, captivating voice. i was so nervous. we decided to meet at the cosmic cafe. i gave him the address...he got directions and we were set to meet. i got there a little before he did. as i was sitting in my car, i kept looking in the rearview mirror..."do i look ok?" "what is he going to think of me?" "god, i'm so nervous?!?!?!?" he finally pulled up in his silver sports car...i got out of the car and met him as he was getting out. OH. MY. GOD. nothing but beauty stood before me. his eyes were alluring, his skin - a soft caramel, nice button-down white shirt, jeans and brown sandals. WOW. and that smile. i felt like i was going to pass out. i was so nervous, but i remember him commenting on how beautiful he thought i was and how he loved how tall i was. i laughed....and grew a little red in the cheeks. we sat and had lovely conversation....he made me feel like spaghetti the entire time. he would look at me with those eyes....almost as if he was looking inside me...inside my soul. normally that would scare the crap out of me....but this felt....natural. we enjoyed the time we had and finally decided to go get some dinner. we drove around in my car and decided that good eats would be a nice place to go. dinner was absolutely lovely - both having the same thing - salmon. the conversation was flowing and i felt myself getting more drawn into him with each new glance. he made me feel like i was the most beautiful woman in the world. after dinner, we had a little more time to spare before he had to meet some friends for a night at the museum that night, so we drove around and found a local park. as we walked, i felt him next to me....the intensity and the warmth of his presence was almost overwhelming that i got lost in it and almost decided to get run over by a turning car on the road. luckily he was there to save me. we walked back to the car, drove back to cosmic cafe and shared a soft, amazing kiss. i will never forget that kiss. i did not want our day to end. we parted ways for the evening. all i could think was that i didn't want it to end. i knew something good was going to happen with this person. i could feel it.

we emailed all week and decided the following weekend to have a sleep over with all the kids. i was afraid it was moving too fast, but he told me you can't put a time stamp on everything. besides, we wanted more of each other. we could not wait.

it was raining that night - badly i remember. when they got over to the house, everyone was drinched...especially horizon as he had to keep going back out to the car. it was monsoon outside. the kids instantly hit it off and horizon and i instantly were consumed by each other...again. tonight, we could make love and it would be so sweet. so amazing. and it was. how could i have known then that i would fall deeply in love with this person and want to spend the rest of my life with him? but i just knew.

things started happening rapidly, but each new thing beautiful in it's own right.

it's now 6 months later and i have never been more happy in my life. more sure of a love in my life. we've already been through a lot together....and will continue to do so, but i welcome it all with open arms. the good times, the struggles, the many trials and tribulations of a relationship. and most importantly...the love. i am ready.

on monday, september 24, 2007, we will have been together 6 months. we came close to a breakup about midway through to this point, but have stuck it out and are flourishing in our love. our relationship is a learning process and we've hit a few bumps in the road, but mild speedbumps is all they are. i love this man genuinely and more strongly than i have ever loved another before. i did not think this kind of love was possible until i met him. i know it's only 6 months and then 1 year...then yearly anniversaries....regardless of the time, i am constantly reminded of the blessing that was brought into my life the day i met horizon. and the most beautiful and amazing children i am proud to have in my life.

i am the happiest and luckiest woman on this earth.

Friday, September 21, 2007

Flashback Friday : Volume 3


Dream Academy - "Life in a Northern Town"

Thursday, September 20, 2007


i'm still here, just buried under this HUGE PILE OF WORK. stay tuned.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Friday, September 14, 2007

My own private ACL fest

alright, since i am a weeeeeeeeeeeee bit depressed that i wasn't able to join some of my friends at the austin city limits festival this year in austin, i'm going to be looking at the online schedule at random moments throughout today and the rest of the weekend and imagine myself being there having the time of my life with my buds. outdoor music festivals feed my soul like nothing else. i've been to acl fest 3 years in the past. due to financial stresses, i haven't been able to go the last 2 years. :( that makes butterfly a very unhappy butterfly. but alas, it is what it is, so i will create my own. the following list will consist of my virtual weekend at acl: schedule can be found here.


12:40-1:20 adam hood
2:30-3:30 bela fleck and the flecktones (although this was a hard decision between them and pete yorn)
4:30-5:30 this is a tough one...i would probably have to split this one in half for crowded house and joss stone
5:15-6:00 jj grey & mofro
6:30-7:30 spoon
7:45-8:15 i would have to check out some of reverend horton heat
8:15-8:45 the killers
8:45-10:00 bjork


4:00-4:30 st. vincent
4:30-5:00 blue october
5:00-5:30 stephen marley
6:30-7:30 damien rice
8:15-8:45 arcade fire
8:45-10:00 muse


12:30-1:30 yo la tengo
2:30-3:15 ben kweller
3:15-3:30 ziggy marley on the kiddie stage!!!!!!!!!!!!!
3:30-4:30 common
5:30-6:30 amos lee (although i would have liked to see regina spektor - i am WAY too big an amos lee fan to miss any of his set)
6:30-7:45 wilco
7:45-8:30 the decemberists
8:30-10:00 bob dylan

and of course if i was ACTUALLY going, i would have studied up on a few of the more unknown bands and checked them out in between times as i could fit them in.

so there we have it virtual weekend at acl. i hope you enjoy it as much as i will. :)

Flashback Friday : Volume 2

today i am giving you a sweet little number by the trashcan sinatras , a scottish band that formed in 1987. they never became too popular here in the states, but are still together and still making lovely music.

(sorry about the vid quality - it IS circa 1991)

The TrashCan Sinatras : "Obscurity Knocks"

Thursday, September 13, 2007


i am so utterly, madly, ecstatically, happily, absurdly, crazily, wildly, extremely.....



You are everything I wanted

The scars of all I’ll ever know

If I told you you were right

Would you take my hand tonight?

If I told you the reasons why

Would you leave your life and ride?

And ride…

You saw all my pieces broken

This darkness that I could never show

If I told you you were right

Would you take my hand tonight?

If I told you the reasons why

Would you leave your life and ride?

And ride…

Monday, September 10, 2007


you know, i have been so busy today, but i have gotten a couple of emails on the subject and everytime i open up msn, i keep seeing how "britney bombed big time".

can we just leave the poor girl alone? usually i could care less and i have the attitude that these rich, bratty celebrities keep getting themselves into these messes and expect to get free rides, etc., but i kind of feel sorry for britney. she has so many deep rooted issues and on top of it has 2 toddler boys that she needs to attend to and give her all to. i hope that she will be able to get help for her problems and become the best mama she can be....who cares about her stardom or her comeback. she needs to focus less on that and focus on getting her life together - no matter how long it takes. god knows she has enough money to take a much needed extended vacation from the public eye - for years...which she should do in my opinion.

Friday, September 07, 2007

Flashback Friday : Intro : Volume 1

i've decided to start a little segment on my blog entitled "FLASHBACK FRIDAY". here i will be posting a video or two of a song(s) that takes me back (and hopefully some for you as well).

i'm 31. which puts me right in the middle of the beginning of the alternative/new wave movement. i was in jr. high and high school. and i was your typical "new waver". i listened to The Edge back when it was 94.5 on the dial and back when it was what i considered "cool" and "fresh". now it just sucks (sorry for those of you out there that possibly listen to that crap, but hey i'm old school). atleast now they have a segment on sunday mornings from 8-10 with josh (who has been there since the beginning and has done "The Adventure Club" from day one - he actually has a nice diverse music taste - one i can relate to) called "old school edge". sad that the only time i can hear good music that i used to listen to back in the day is for 2 hours on an early sunday morning when i would much rather be sleeping. what can ya do?

anyway....i could go on about all of this for hours, and my "FLASHBACK FRIDAY"'s will not be like this everytime i promise. just wanted to give a bit of premise behind my madness.

these songs/videos will more than likely not consist of the 80's "cheese" as i like to call it. (don't get me wrong - i was all about the 80's cheese as well), but i'm talking about the 80's/early 90's alternative/new wave intro/brit pop movement.

with that said, i have 2 lovely gems today i would like to share with ya'll (yes, i'm from texas, hush).

1. first we will start off with a little known band called the bodeans. this band was definitely not mainstream, but a certain tv show named party of five gave them a shine in the spotlight. yes, folks, this is where your sexy character from lost made his big break. as the oldest brother charlie salinger. ah, how i adored that show...but dammit i'm diverting away from my point here.

without further adu, i give you the bodeans - "closer to free"

(and wouldn't you know it, there's a minimal selection of youtube videos for this song, so strangely enough someone meshed the song with harry potter: 3. hmmmm - weird, but oh well)

2. we have a fairly well known band, UB40, with a fairly unknown song of theirs called "higher ground". i love the vibe of this just grooves so well.


Thursday, September 06, 2007

Faerie Tale Theatre

oh my gosh - i just got jerked back into childhood. i used to sit and watch these with my dad ALL the time.

i think i'm going to go home tonight and watch some of these on youtube. :)

Robert Randolph

i have always dug robert randolph. i have heard this song several times now over the past couple of weeks - it's just awesome.

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Ron Paul

in my work boredom yesterday and again today (ugh! - i know i should enjoy the break but still), i'm REALLY starting to *like* this guy. i never thought i would say that about a republican, but he's not your average run of the mill right wing...he's libertarian which i seem to move towards as well. i really really like his viewpoint on giving the state more authority instead of the federal govt running everything in our lives. i don't agree with some of his conservative views, but maybe this is truly what we need and my dad says this all the time...we need conservative at the federal level and more liberal at the state level. i am starting to believe this more and more...and although conservative, ron paul is a firm believer in more power and more decisions state-wise.

*like* = as much as you could *like* a freakin politician. and he's from hey. although we've seen what the last fuck-face from texas has done. but we aren't all bad down here :)

"I want to be president mainly for what I don't want to do: I don't want to run your life, I don't want to run the economy and I don't want to police the world." -Ron Paul

that caught my attention right there. hopefully it's not just a lure though. dammit - why can't they just put oprah or montel williams in as president? they would both do a damn good job being such huge humanitarians. and what's even sadder is that i would feel more comfortable having our country run by a talk show host. ugh. i'm moving out of the country. i'm feeling ill.